Am I selfish for investing in me?

One of the biggest roadblocks to success, is helping clients to understand that giving yourself time, investing in ‘self’, being selfish….call it what you will, is crucial to achieving the desired outcome (success). More than this, it is crucial to being able to play the long game, to being the best version of yourself and being able to operate at your best every damn day!

Many people sacrifice their own time, their own health, their own goals in order to help those around them. This is very noble, but sometimes you need to throw yourself the life preserver.

I am talking about ‘self-care’. We live in a busy and chaotic world that comes with its ‘stresses’ and demands, and taking some time for you, for your own wellbeing will make sure that you show up as the best version of you that you can. Feeling physically, mentally & emotionally fit which positively impacts your relationships both personally and professionally. Caring for self and the wellbeing of who you are mentally and physically should never be deemed as narcissistic or selfish. You cannot be the best person for yourself and others if you don’t take time to work out what makes you happy first.

What are some areas to address?

1. Incorporating more movement and exercise into your day: Gym, stretch, run, hike, yoga, walk. Just move and ideally outside where possible.
2. Sleep is crucial: Do not get hung up on the amount of sleep (although 6.5hrs – 8hrs is ideal), it is about quality of sleep. 6 hours of sleep that includes good REM and deep sleep periods is ideal. To help improve sleep, work on your night-time routine. Blue light blocking glasses, magnesium, no screens for 1 – 2 hours before bed, lavender oil on your pillow & chamomile tea.
3. Meditation & Journaling: This is something that many ignore because of the feeling of discomfort or it being ‘to hard’. It is a great way to manage stress, increase creativity and productivity. 2 minutes for journaling and 5 – 20 minutes for meditation each day. A small time investment. This is time alone with our thoughts that we rarely get.
4. Breath work: Like meditation, this is about allowing us a few minutes to calm ourselves, de-stress and re-gain clarity of thought.
5. E-mail management: Do not feel the need to respond to e-mails as soon as they come in. If it were that urgent, the person would call you. Especially if you are simply CC’d in on the e-mail. Allocate 2 x 1 hour blocks to address e-mails each day. This will increase productivity and reduce e-mail associated stress.
6. Take yourself out on a date: WHAT???? Ok, what this means is…..grab a coffee and cake. Take yourself for lunch. Just have some time alone to enjoy the pleasures of a nice meal or a movie or the beach. Use this time to do the journaling (this is called ‘stacking’).
7. Hobbies & Passions: As part of the meditation and journaling try to recall what you love to do. Music? Surfing? Painting? Movies? Whatever it may be that you used to do, or currently love to do…..start doing it.
8. Massage: Not only are you working on ironing out the knots from daily life, but you are taking time to relax, de-stress and be with self.

Have you noticed a theme? Spend time alone. Away from social media, emails and demands on your time and energy. Allow yourself to relax, smile, experience fun and pleasure. It will make you a better human and a more productive person.